Blog Tour: Guest Post by Jeff Strand + Giveaway
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Ten Important Safety Tips When Using A Voodoo Doll
In my novel A Bad Day For Voodoo
, sixteen-year-old Tyler Churchill gets a voodoo doll of his history teacher, Mr. Click, and jabs it with a pin. It doesn’t work out well. He really shouldn’t have done it. So that others will learn from Tyler’s mistakes, I now present Ten Important Safety Tips When Using A Voodoo Doll
1. Don’t make a voodoo doll of your history teacher.
2. If you do
make a voodoo doll of your history teacher, don’t poke it with a pin.
3. If you do make the doll and poke it with the pin, don’t keep messing with it. Just put the doll someplace safe.
4. If you keep messing with the doll and don’t put it someplace safe, confess what you’ve done. Don’t hide it and let things spiral out of control. I repeat: Don’t hide it and let things spiral out of control.
5. If things spiral out of control, it’s not too late to fix them. Just don’t—
6. If you already did the thing that I didn’t even get to finish warning you about before you did it, there’s still a chance that you can get out of this, though probably not with all of your fingers and toes. Just—
7. Look, I need you to work with me here! These are forces that mankind was not meant to...aw, jeez, did you really just do that? For real? You realize that this can’t be undone, right? You may have just doomed humanity. I’ve got three important safety tips left but none of them will do any good! Argh! Argh! Argh! I’ll just have to make stuff up to fill the rest of the space.
8. Look both ways before crossing the street.
9. Don’t use hydrochloric acid as toothpaste.
10. Now that you’ve seen the horrific results, I think the first tip bears repeating: Don’t make a voodoo doll of your history teacher. Really. Don’t do it.
About the Author
JEFF STRAND is a three-time nominee for the Bram Stoker Award, lives in Tampa, Florida, and doesn’t believe in voodoo. But he thinks you should carry a doll around, go up to people you don’t like, and chuckle while you jab at it with pins, just to make them squirm. Poke around his gleefully macabre website.
Winner will be contacted via e-mail. If he/she does not reply
within 48 hours, another winner will be chosen.
Labels: giveaways, guest post, jeff strand
I think if Bad Day for Voodoo makes me giggle like this post did, I'm going to really like it. :) Thanks for the guest post & for the giveaway!
Thanks for the giveaway! That guest post was hilarious!! I hadn't heard of the book before now, but after reading your post, it's definitely on my TBR list. :)
The guest post was hilarious! Thanks for the giveaway.
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